Where I stood
I stood and waited Where I stood
I stood and thought
I stood and thunk
And thunk it hard
The night before
I'd found myself
before the television
I wore no trousers
and I laughed
at a televised funeral
Where I stood
I looked up and thought
About years ago
when I would fill
these cavernous spaces
with the deep and drawn-out
voices of wolves
and wolf men
The lady prostrate
laying out her soul
before a merciful God
is sexy
Then there I stand
and “Here lies the heart
of Robert Ashley”
In a little room
the wolf will squeal
In here
the wolf will roar
I will steal the heart
of Robert Ashley
and I will run away
with this little petrified
flesh biscuit
in a sandwich bag
in my pocket
then I will go home
and play piano
then I will stand and think
for a long, long time
then I will eat the heart
of Robert Ashley
then I will play piano
until my own heart stops
or at least until
my fingers ache a bit
I will steal the heart
of Robert Ashley
then I will run away
and nobody will find me
Robert Ashley will love me
like he has never loved
another man
And I will keep
him in my pocket
The lady who prays
will turn around
and see me with
sharp objects
she will see me
reach into the walls
my arms like
a cucumber plant
reaching for the sun
she will see me
steal the heart
of Robert Ashley
and she will see me
run away
with the heart of
Robert Ashley
in my pocket
in a sandwich bag
and she will roar
like a deep-wolf
in a cavernous space
I will run for a long time
with the heart of
Robert Ashley
and I will never stop running
until my own heart stops
or at least
until my feet ache a bit
Then I will sit a long time
and think
and I will hold the heart
of Robert Ashley
to my ear
and it will whisper to me
the prayer of the prostrate lady
When the heart has
finished its recital
I will open it
with a penknife
It is almost dust
it is not a cavernous space
from inside the heart
of Robert Ashley
the wolf will squeal
but only dogs will hear
And thus I, Robert Ashley, prove
that the heart of man belongs to dogs
that the heart of music belongs to dogs
that the world belongs to dogs
and that dogs are cavernous spaces
I will stand still
I will wave at dogs
until my heart stops
or at least until my arm aches a bit
I will cut out my heart
and feed it to the dogs who wave back
then I will lay on my back
with no trousers on
and no heart
and no Robert Ashley
and no dogs
and no lady
and no afternoon
and no funeral
and no telephones
and no television
and no sandwich bags
and no flesh
and listen, finally, to the voice of the wolf.
* written in Warsaw, September 2011
** passages of this piece appear in the new Classwar Karaoke compilation
*** Ergo Phizmiz Sextet performs Robert Ashley's "Purposeful Lady Slow Afternoon" is out very soon on Populista, part of Bolt Records.
